From Foreplay to Finish: 20+ Tips for Better Sex

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It’s human nature to want to be better. Neuroscience has confirmed that in order for people to be truly happy, they want something more. It doesn’t matter if it’s a personal journey or a partnered one, the fact remains the same—being “better” can be a driving force.

 

Do You want to be Better at Sex?

Well, who doesn’t, right? According to statistics, 75% of women and 71% of men reported sexual confidence as the number one attribute they’re looking for in their perfect mate. Being better at sex, from foreplay to finish, may translate to more sexual confidence—making you a sought-after partner. 

  

What is Foreplay?

Let’s start at the beginning. Foreplay most often refers to erotic stimulation before intercourse. But, foreplay doesn’t necessarily have to lead to intercourse. You can consider it as a stand-alone pleasure for yourselves. 

 

Sexual acts such as oral and manual stimulation, kissing, and heavy petting can be incredibly satisfying just by themselves. But, they can also serve to set the mood for the beginning of the entire sexual experience. 

 

3 Reasons Foreplay is Important:

Foreplay can get you in the mood.

Kissing triggers the release of oxytocin, dopamine, and serotonin, which increases the feelings of affection, bonding, and euphoria. 

 

Foreplay can prepare your body for sex.

Engaging in foreplay can serve a physical and emotional purpose by increasing bodily responses in preparation for sex. 

 

Foreplay helps maintain intimacy.

Touching, kissing, and being intimately close to your partner can help build stronger bonds between you. 

 

Science has shown that foreplay provides a buildup of excitement prior to intercourse that can lead to better orgasms and overall sexual experiences.

 

But often foreplay can feel like something that is keeping you from “the main event”, so it can be rushed and not enjoyed to the fullest extent. Here are some suggestions that may make foreplay more enticing for you and your partner.

 

8 Foreplay Ideas to Inspire You!

  • Play a Game: There are games specifically created to make foreplay a fun adventure.
  • Talk Dirty: Consider sending your mate sexts throughout the day, creating sexy anticipation.
  • Start with Roleplaying: Get into the mood by flirting in new roles. 
  • Make Out Session: Begin by kissing like you really mean it. 
  • No Hands: Try something different such as using only your tongue to create foreplay stimulation. 
  • Exploration: Explore lesser-known erogenous areas such as ear lobes, the nape of the neck, inner wrist, or behind the knee. 
  • Edible Adventures: Try flavored lubricants, lotions, and potions to make foreplay a delicious treat. 
  • Enjoy Erotica: Consider reading something sexy to your lover to get blood, and ideas, flowing.

 

Be creative. Be inventive. Make foreplay into the important element of sex that it truly is. 

  

Better Sex

Now that you’ve made foreplay so amazing, you’ll need to give intercourse some attention. 

 

Communication can be an important part of making sex better. Ask your lover what feels good, what they enjoy, and what they would like to have more of. Tell your partner what you like. Discuss your fantasies and desires. 

 

If communication feels uncomfortable, try creating a ‘Shared Sex Journal’ where you can both write your private thoughts and wishes in regard to sexual desires. 

 

Don’t get stuck in a rut! Try new positions and sex toys to switch things up. And don’t always have sex in the same locations—the shower or kitchen counter can add excitement. Research has shown that the more diverse sexual practices are, the longer sex lasts. 

 

And just like you slowed down and enjoyed foreplay, your sexual main course should also be savored and not rushed. Take your time and relish the pleasurable feelings. 

 

According to Harvard Health, there are a few simple things that can be done to make your sex life better. These include practicing touching, using vibrators, and doing Kegel exercises to strengthen pelvic floor muscles. 

 

Also, don’t discount using lubricants! Dry intimate tissues can cause discomfort. Sometimes simply using a top-quality lube can make sex smoother and much more comfortable. 

 

A Quick Recap for Better Sex Practices:

  • Communicate
  • Switch Things Up
  • Slow Down
  • Practice Touching
  • Use Vibrators
  • Do Kegel Exercises
  • Use Lube

 

A Finer Finish 

Sex shouldn’t automatically end with a climax. First, make sure that your partner is satisfied and has reached the place where they want—be that orgasm or just a feeling of completion. Check in with each other on how the sexual experience was—what you enjoyed the most.

 

Kiss, cuddle, hug, touch, and take time to enjoy the intimate connection that you just shared. 

 

Too often orgasm marks the end of sex, when a bit of aftercare can go a long way in building an intimate bond and making the entire experience feel more important. Relax and enjoy the afterglow. Allow your body to recover from the exertion. 

 

Sex can sometimes make us feel vulnerable and emotional. These are normal feelings due to physical intimacy. Allowing your connection to continue after orgasm can help you feel closer and safe in your relationship. 

 

Foreplay + Intercourse + Aftercare

Every part of your sexual encounter can be significant. Use these ideas to inspire your sexual experiences. The more effort that’s put into sex, the better it can be.

 

Keep exploring, educating yourself, and trying new things. Practice helps us get better—which can help lead to better sex. 

 

Are you ready to make your sex life better? Have you ever tried any of the tips shared in this article? What’s made your sexual activities more fun? Please send me your questions and comments. I would love to hear from you.


Dr. Sunny does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Any information published on this website is not intended as a substitute for medical advice, and you should not take any action before consulting with a healthcare professional.

Dr. Sunny Rodgers is a clinician, author, and speaker who has worked in the wellness industry since 2000. She holds a Ph.D. in Human Sexuality, a Master of Arts in Clinical Sexology, and is an accredited Sexual Health Educator. She is the Founder of The Institute of Intimate Health, an Ambassador for the American Sexual Health Association, regular lecturer for the UCLA David Geffen School of Medicine, Sexual Confidence Coach for the Marigold App, and a professional Sex Toy Concierge™. Rodgers hosted a popular weekly show on Playboy Radio, has been an expert guest on several TV and radio programs, and is a regular contributor to HuffPost, Men's Health, Cosmo, Bustle, and many more publications.