Strap-ons are popular these days! What used to be tucked into a small corner of your local adult shop is now proudly displayed in an array of styles. Everyone from sex educators to manufacturers, retailers, open-minded consumers, and movie and television writers seems to have come together to bring strap-ons and harnesses into the mainstream.
The great news for intrepid sexual explorers like yourself is that many options exist! But it can also make shopping for a strap-on a bit daunting because, you know, there are so many options. That’s why today we’re doing a bit of a deep dive on strap-ons. We’ll go over precisely what a strap-on is, what types of harnesses exist, the bells and whistles that can take your strap-on experience to the next level, and how you can use all that information to help you find the absolute best strap-on harness for you!
What is a Strap On?
A strap-on is something someone wears to penetrate their partner. Generally, a strap-on is two separate items: a dildo and a harness that holds the dildo in place. These can be purchased separately, allowing users to mix and match until they find their ideal combination or to use a selection of different dildos with their favorite harness.
Alternatively, they can be purchased in a set, like the Strap-On And Silicone Dildo Kit.
When we talk about strap-ons, we usually refer to a harness you or your partner would wear around your/their hips. However! You can wear certain harnesses on your thigh, chest, or even face.
What to consider when shopping for a strap-on harness
When you embark on your strap-on harness hunt, there are some things to consider. In this section, we'll look at harness styles and some of the features you might want to consider when shopping. From harness styles to materials to versatility to vibration, let’s talk about it!
What style harness?
As I mentioned above, multiple styles of harnesses can (and do) work in sorts of ways. The most popular type of harness is the kind you'd wear around your waist, so let’s talk about that. First off, they come in a wide array of styles:
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Underwear - Boxer/Brief/Panty
As the name suggests, this style of strap-on fits like regular underwear. These harnesses are available in boxer briefs to lacy lingerie. They can be less supportive than other strap-on styles, so they may not be ideal for use with heavier dildos. Also, many (but not all) underwear-style harnesses cover the anus and genitals.
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Corset
Corset-style harnesses feature a loop around each leg and a band around the waist that cinches together (like a corset would). They offer a visually appealing look as well as solid support. This style usually leaves the genitals and anus bare, allowing easy stimulation.
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Three-strap/jock
This style fits like a standard jock strap with a loop around each leg as well as one around the waist. The multiple straps allow users to adjust for a comfortable fit and help them maintain solid control of their dildo. Additionally, jock-style harnesses leave the wearer’s genitals and anus easily accessible, which makes for more stimulation possibilities.
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Two strap/g-string
This type of harness fits like a g-string or thong, with one loop around the waist and another between the legs and the butt cheeks. The amount of control over the dildo can vary depending on the thickness of the harness.
What you choose will depend on several factors: comfort, size, style preferences, and any penetrative sex activities you want to engage in while wearing your harness.
Something to remember about any harness is that it will require a harness-compatible dildo or vibrator. To be harness-compatible, your penetrator must have a flared base to fit securely in your strap-on’s O-ring or connection point.
What is it made out of?
Harnesses come in a whole variety of materials. Being familiar with the pros and cons of each will help you find a harness you love. Let’s talk about some of the most popular materials for harnesses.
- Leather and vegan leather can be soft, durable, and sexy AF. They are also porous materials, so they are not always easy to keep clean.
- Nylon, on the other hand, is super easy to clean while still durable.
- Polyester is versatile and low maintenance. All sorts of different harnesses are made with it.
For harnesses that feature metal elements, look for ones that specify nickel-free, as nickel can cause rashes for some folks.
In terms of comfort, look for adjustable harnesses -- especially in the waist-- and padded -- especially in the thigh and groin. Penetrating a partner with a strap-on is taxing. You want your harness to be comfortable and don’t want any chafing.
Should it be versatile?
If you are new to strap-on play, you might be tempted to grab a harness and dildo that work well together and call it a day, but I’d advise you to consider your strap-on future. When attaching dildos to harnesses, some have an opening cut right into them. These holes are one size, meaning they fit one size dildo, specifically.
Other harnesses use snaps or velcro to secure a metal or rubber ring called an O-ring that's slipped over the base of the dildo. Harnesses with O-rings are an excellent choice for optimum versatility, as they let you switch out the O-ring to accommodate dildos of many different sizes and shapes.
Do you want vibration?
If you want your strap-on play to involve vibration, you have options. There are two ways to have a vibrating strap-on: use a dildo that vibrates or a harness that vibrates. As we discuss harnesses today, we will focus on that second option.
Generally, when you want vibration from your harness, you can get it as a harness with a bullet vibe pocket. What is nice about this option is that while the harness can accommodate a bullet vibe when you want it to, it remains a regular harness if you choose not to add vibration.
Okay, we reviewed many things to consider when shopping for a harness. Are you ready to pick one yet? If not, don’t worry. The following section is about taking the information we discussed here (and some new stuff) and using it to find your way to the right harness for you!
How should you choose a harness?
We've discovered that there’s a lot to think about when shopping for a harness. Also, everyone’s tastes and preferences are different, which makes it not only tricky but also probably a bad idea for me to announce, “This is the good harness; you should all use this one”. While there are some universal truths like “your harness should be comfortable and fit well” and “the dildo you pick should be enjoyable for the person being penetrated”, there’s still a lot that will vary from person to person.
Thankfully, there are some general criteria that I think help to think about when shopping for pleasure products (and that you can adjust and tailor to the specific products at hand) that we will now look at to help you zero in on your ideal strap-on harness.
- Budget: Knowing how much you want to spend is a great way to narrow your options. Set a budget and immediately eliminate options that fall outside of it.
- Ratings/Reviews: The internet is your friend. You might want to check out some reviews on Harnesses so you don’t fall into the trap of picking a cute thing that doesn’t work great.
- Style: We went over all of those styles, if you know that there is one you prefer or even one you don’t want, that will help narrow it down.
- Features: If you know you want a bullet vibe pocket or O-ring attachments, you can quickly eliminate the other.
- Material: Knowing which materials you’d prefer for your harness will get you closer to the right one.
- Comfort: Look for padding and adjustability. Harness comfort is super-important.
- Aesthetics: As you get closer, get picky!
There’s a lot to think about, but it’s worth finding a harness you love. Once you’ve found the right strap-on harness, check out PinkCherry for the dildos, lube and strap-on accoutrement you need to start your harness adventures off right!
