We’ve got a question for you. Don’t worry; it’s an easy one! Are you part of a couple? Now, keep in mind that we are not at all picky about your definition of ‘couple.’ Maybe you’re married, dating, common law, casual sexing, monogamous, polyamorous, open - it doesn’t matter to us in the least. The only things that we care about when it comes to your relationship are that a. it’s healthy and b. your sex life is on point.
Humour us for a moment and take a look at that second thing. Think about it. Is your sex life fantastic, great, wonderful, pretty good or maybe a little lacklustre? Be honest, we’re not judging! Now, if you found yourself answering ‘pretty good’ or ‘lackluster’, you need to know that you will never, and we repeat NEVER catch us suggesting that you need to ‘spice up your sex life.’ We mildly hate that phrase, actually. What, are you going to sprinkle some cinnamon on your sex life? A pinch of rosemary perhaps? Not likely! We will say that if you and your partner have been finding things just a little less-than lately, or even if you have amazing sex every time and want to make it even more amazing, we can help! Today we’re talking about a few of the best sex toys for couples to share: what they are, why you might want to give ‘em a go, and tips on how to bring up the idea of sharing or using a toy with your partner.
First off, we want to say that there really aren’t many adult toys that can’t be used with a partner. While it’s true that vibrators, dildos, masturbators, prostate massagers and more are usually used to please one person at a time, guess what? Letting your mate take control of a sex toy, or having them surrender a toy to you automatically makes that vibe, dildo or otherwise a couple’s sex toy. It’s kind of magical how that works! Having said that, some toys are specifically meant for shared pleasure. In other words, these sex toys were created for couples to use together, at the same time. Let’s have a look at them, shall we?
The We-Vibe is first up. Not only is the We-Vibe one of the best-known couple’s toys to ever exist, it was invented by a couple, too. Husband Bruce and wife Melody Murison came up with the concept of a vibrator that could be worn during sex, and in 2008, the first We-Vibe was launched. Unique for its time, the original We-Vibe was shaped into a ‘C’ or ‘U’. One vibrating end was inserted into the vagina while the other (also vibrating) end curved around to target the clitoris. The We-Vibe’s insertable side tucked up neatly against the upper vaginal wall and g-spot, leaving room for a penis to move inside. The original was a wild success, as were the We-Vibes that came after. In 2014, We-Vibe introduced We-Connect, a Bluetooth and WiFi enabled application that lets couples activate and control their partner’s vibrator from anywhere in the world. We’d like to think that WeConnect has saved many a long distance relationship! Of course, you don’t need to be far apart to enjoy the We-Vibe; it’s just as much fun (maybe more) when you’re both in the room.
The couple appeal of this type of vibe is, of course, the ability to fully share pleasure and stimulation. The We-Vibe, however, is not your only option for shared vibration, and that brings us to our next couple’s toy – the vibrating cock ring.
We wrote an entire blog post dedicated to the cock ring, if you’re interested, but here’s a summary. Cock rings have been used in one form or another for centuries. The main function of a cock ring is erection enhancement (a better boner), but shared pleasure is another benefit that definitely needs to be mentioned. Cock rings are worn over the base of the penis or dildo. The penis or dildo penetrates a partner during sex. When the cock ring in question is packing a vibrator, not only will its wearer feel a sexy buzz, the partner being penetrated will, too. So, to sum up, shared vibration plus a harder erection. Win-Win! There are about a zillion vibrating cock rings available, from the super-simple to the higher end. We recommend our Happy Penis or Come Full Purple cock rings to beginners – they’re extra user friendly, very non-intimidating and nice and stretchy for easy positioning. If you or your partner have used a cock ring in the past, you can skip ahead to something like the rechargeable A1 Rechargeable Cock Ring in Black/Chrome or We-Vibe’s We-Connect enabled Pivot.
There’s one more specific-to-couples sex toy type we want to talk about, and that’s the strap-on. Like the We-Vibe and the vibrating cock ring, the strap-on requires the pleasure cooperation of two people. The term ‘strap-on’ can mean any dildo, vibe or probe worn in a harness, a one-piece harnessed dildo or what’s known as a strapless strap-on (just like it sounds – no straps!) A strap-on is used by one partner to penetrate another, and there are all kinds of ways that scenario could play out. A standard strap-on system comes with a separated penetrator and harness. The dildo or vibe is secured to the harness, which in turn is ‘strapped on’ to the wearer’s pelvis, usually around hips, thighs and butt. Speaking of the wearer, that’s completely up to you and your partner. Most strap-on sets include a standard dildo best for women and non-penis owners, but there are definitely hollow strap-on sets and hollow penis-ready dildos able to be used with a harness. We’ve noticed lots of interest in pegging lately, and we love it! Pegging, for those who don’t know, is when a woman straps on a dildo and penetrates her male partner. The term may be (relatively) new, but the act itself has definitely been around for much longer than many people felt comfortable talking about. We’re very very happy to see male buttplay normalized and encouraged, because it can be incredibly enjoyable, exciting, empowering and bonding for both partners.
Okay, on the topic of pegging, let’s talk lube! Lube isn’t exactly a sex toy, we know. It is, however, a great accessory to fantastic sex (and a very necessary one for anal play) and can make playing with toys all the more enjoyable. If it’s your, or your partner’s first time using a sex toy together (especially a penetrative toy), you’ll want the whole experience to be as smooth, slippery and pleasurable as possible. Water based lube is safe for all toy materials, so we always recommend it be used, but if your toy isn’t silicone, you can certainly use a silicone based lubricant, too. Of course, we can’t leave flavoured lubricants out of the couple-centered pleasure equation! To sweeten up going down, add a few drops of a delicious Wicked or Sliquid concoction. Bonus: they’re safe to use with toys or condoms if and when things progress.
Okay, we promised you some tips on how to broach the subject of using sex toys with a partner. Assuming that they’re not already on board, we have an easy trick - blame it on us! Say you read a very informative, hilarious and excellently written article about sex toys for couples, and it got you excited and curious. That should do the trick! If not though, we’ll tell you to fall back on an age-old tactic – honest communication! Talk to your partner about sex toys. You don’t need to say ‘Hey babe, our sex is kind of boring, can we try a vibrator?’, but you could mention that you’ve been thinking about maybe picking up a fun new sex toy for both of you. Emphasize the ‘both of you’ part so they know it’s all about making you feel good together. Of course, if you’re pretty sure they’ll be open to the idea of playing together, you could always just go ahead and pick up one of our fantastic PinkCherry bullet vibes
These little vibrators are completely non-threatening, extra user-friendly, and can be used in just about any sexy situation. Basically, the bullet vibe is the perfect gateway toy!
We could go on forever about the joys of sex toys for couples, but we’ve got a word limit here, folks! One of the best tools we can offer when it comes to picking a toy for sharing is our Best Sex Toys for Couples section. It’s packed with a specially curated and ever-changing collection of top couple friendly favourites. Aside from the toys we covered today, you’ll also find lots of sexy accessories, playful bondage must-haves and even some swing, support and suspension systems. Like we said at the beginning, there aren’t many sex toys that can’t be enjoyed together, and we’re sure you and your partner will have lots of fun proving us right! As always, play safe friends!